Locked Room Mini-stery

Tatsuko Onizuka

Thanks to this strange prison's seemingly complete lack of security, Tatsuko has found that she is able to wander around with little restriction, save for actually leaving, of course. Sure, there were a few locked doors, but that was to be expected. She could deal with that later.

What was far more intriguing was the tiny little door at the end of the hall near that giant empty room. Why was it here? What could possibly be behind a door this size? It was too small and in too impractical a space to be for storage, and there was already a warehouse. What sort of strange little creature could fit through a door this size?

That's where Tatsuko had found herself, kneeling down on the floor beside the door, inspecting it from all angles, trying to imagine just what sort of purpose this door could serve.

Andrew Edgeworth

The picture was getting disconcertingly clearer, if only incrementally so, as Andrew met more of his cellmates. He was no stranger to ruminating on and making connections on seemingly unrelated information, but this was clearly too much to take on at once.

He sighs, shaking his head slightly as he made his way back to his cell; a bed was a bed, even if not the most comfortable one. At least…until Andrew sees the odd stranger crouched down in front of a small door.

"Were you…hoping to fit?" Surprisingly, he doesn't mean it sarcastically. She seemed to be very earnestly trying to get through-

Tatsuko Onizuka

Tatsuko looks up at the sound of another voice. She gives him a confused and unamused expression as though he was the one suggesting something dumb, rather than the person crouched on the ground trying to open a door clearly not meant for her.

"No? Obviously I can't fit?" She says this slowly, as though she feels confused that she needs to explain this at all.

"I was just thinking about what it could be for, 'cuz it's clearly not for a person. Maybe a really tiny one, though. Like a gnome or some shit. Either that or a dog." Dog warden… She shrugs. "Those are my top guesses right now." She looks up at him curiously, as if inquiring as to what he thinks might be the door's purpose.

Andrew Edgeworth

Andrew was surprised it took this long to meet somebody with a temper, though he would be too if a million bells were suddenly strapped to him against his will.

"With what I've seen so far, I wouldn't put it past our captors to have the sense of humor to periodically send out a small gnome to cause chaos." His gaze skeptically rises to the nameplate beside the little door. "Named Jackalope, I guess."

"There's some standards in place to keep our stay here humane, so the chance of a therapy dog being sent to us isn't an unreasonable guess. As for why through a small door in the wall? Your guess is as good as mine."

Tatsuko Onizuka

If Tatsuko knew what a jackalope was, seeing the nameplate would probably change her impression of what kind of creature would use this door. However, she does not, so her initial guesses remain unchanged. She smirks, seemingly pleased at the idea.

"Hell yeah! Prison would be so boring without some little creatures to fuck shit up. It'll really liven the place up!" She laughs at the idea. If this doesn't end up happening, she'll be disappointed now that she's got it in her head.

"I guess the place is pretty nice for a prison, but I didn't think kidnapping was considered "humane" now. Least you can do is wake me up before strapping me in a stupid costume and throwing me in a cell," she grumbles.

Andrew Edgeworth

"You'd be at quite the disadvantage if so, with all those bells alerting where you are. Though, I doubt you mind inviting fights all that much." Oddly, he doesn't seem to register the horns or see them as particularly notable, his dry sarcasm no different than usual. "Humane enough to be translating your Japanese to me in real time."

Andrew came upon a curious train of thought. "Costume? Do you mean the straitjacket, or are you in entirely different clothing from your last memory before being kidnapped?"

Tatsuko Onizuka

"Hey, I'll have you know I could totally take a gnome in a fight! You know how fucking small they are?" She gestures at the small door, as though that's supposed to prove some sort of point. "I'd send it flying!"

At the other's words, she pauses for a moment, confused. Translating? They had been speaking different languages? Though now that she focused, she could definitely hear that the man was speaking a different language, one that she usually wouldn't be able to understand, yet somehow could now. "…Huh. Guess everyone has been talking differently. Hadn't noticed. Wonder how that's happening. Think they put some sort of chips in our brains?"

Tatsuko waved her arms, emphasizing the sleeves and straps on her jacket. "The straightjacket, duh! I sure as hell didn't put this on! What the hell's up with that?"

Andrew Edgeworth

"One, sure. But twenty? Fifty?" Andrew shouldn't be humoring her, but he was a sucker for a good Bit.™

Unfortunately, the chip theory wasn't as ludicrous as he wanted to write it off as. "I wouldn't be surprised if so, it pales in comparison to how the shower room 'teleports' our straitjackets off of us. Automatic translation brain chips would be the most grounded thing to happen here so far, unfortunately. And If I could tell you how we got in them in the first place, I wouldn't be in one either."

Tatsuko Onizuka

Tatsuko furrows her brow, frowning. "Shit, I didn't think about that. A whole gnome army could be behind there, huh? I think I could hold off twenty, but maybe not fifty. Maybe if we both fought them at the same time? How many gnomes do you think you could take down?" She will keep at this bit until she decides it isn't funny anymore, and that time isn't now.

"Ugh, I don't get this at all!" She shakes her head. "Since we're speaking different languages, we're probably from different places, but how did we all end up in the same prison? I'd say it's some sorta government conspiracy, but what government? Ugh, this is making my head hurt!"

She groans and stomps her foot. "Whatever, I don't care about how we got here! I wanna see the fucker who took us all! I'll make you regret the day you locked up Tatsuko Onizuka!"

Andrew Edgeworth

"At my age? Please. If I'm lucky, two if we're working with the horror movie variety of small, vicious creature. I don't think they'd be so merciful as to send out plastic garden gnomes you could just kick over. If I had some kind of weapon, though, that would be a different story to what we could take down."

Tatsuko Onizuka, huh? Truly a little firecracker. "Government can be incomprehensible, but I truly have no idea how an international prison of a small group of completely unrelated people would further…any political aims."

Andrew angles his head at her again, cutting to the chase. "You seem unconcerned of anything to be punished for, though; is it an act or do you truly not have a crime you remember that would warrant you to be in prison?"

Tatsuko Onizuka

"Yeah, a weapon would be nice to have. Haven't seen any around here, though. Guess that kinda makes sense, since it's a prison."

Tatsuko shrugs. "The government works in mysterious ways!" Which may just be her way of saying that she doesn't know how the government works. Which she does not. "Is this what the UN does? I don't think I've done any war crimes recently, but they might've changed them and I forgot."

She crosses her arms, narrowing her eyes at the man. "Hey, nobody's convicted me of anything yet! You won't get a confession out of me that easily!" That might as well be an admission of guilt. "What about you? If you're here, you must've done some sort of crime too!'

Andrew Edgeworth

"You don't think, hm? Not sure that would hold up in court." Personally, he had doubts that a young woman hoping to fight gnomes and this bad at hiding things would annoy the United Nations to this degree. "…or that, either. Lucky for you, I doubt an organization that tells governments to calm down would have a vested interest in you, anyway. Well, unless you were hoping for that."

He sighs. "Naturally, yes."

Tatsuko Onizuka

"Well, does this look like a court to you?" she says, as if that proves some sort of point. Good thing Andrew did not say that part about annoying the United Nations out loud. She might have taken that as a challenge. "Nah, not interested in that at all. Don't think anyone there would be that fun."

"Cool. The glasses make you seem kinda boring, but I guess there's more." Fellas, is it lame to see? "You haven't told me your name either."

Andrew Edgeworth

"Out here, no." He points a thumb in the direction of the projection room. "The single chair in that room looks much more like a place where judging happens, though certainly not a professional one."

"Personally, I have no problems with how 'boring' people think I am if it means I can see. Though I would not call my crime…cool." The end of his sentence turns scathing, though it's clearly not directed at Tatsuko.

"…fair enough, as you announced your full name unprompted. Andrew Edgeworth."